We are screwed

Yeah, it's true. Our way of life is entirely unsustainable, and I can prove it with a few very simple arguments.

There's a finite amount of energy available on our planet. Almost all of it comes from the sun, which is converted by plants into stems and leaves and other good stuff they use to survive. Herbivores eat the plants and steal some of the energy within them, which in turn helps them grow and develop. Finally, carnivores eat the herbivores and steal their energy. We're pretty much at the top of this pyramid, enjoying the benefits of consuming hundreds of other organisms. There is less energy available to each level as you ascend this structure, however, because the transfer of energy is not entirely efficient. Therefore, there are far less carnivores than plants, for example.

It used to be that we were limited by this cycle of birth and death and the energy available within our own lifetimes, but then we discovered fossil fuels. These fuels are formed from the remains of dead plants and animals, crushed under the weight of the earth and water for millions of years. Because of this, they contain a portion of the sun's energy gathered throughout the entire history of life on our planet. After we found this source of (seemingly) limitless energy, we started making machines that could accomplish what no organism limited by photosynthesis could do. This made our lives pretty easy, and since we had so much extra energy in the form of food, our population began to explode. Things were looking pretty good for quite a while.

We can maintain our current lifestyles only because fossil fuels continue to be extracted from the earth, but there is a huge, glaring problem with this. It takes so long for fossil fuels to form that they are not being replaced. When they run out, the energy is gone for good, and we'll be forced to return to a simpler way of life where we depend on the sun for the majority of our energy. This is the first and most obvious way that our civilization is unsustainable.

Fossil fuels, unfortunately, also contain a lot of toxins that have been built up over the millenia, and burning them releases these into the air where they can travel pretty much everywhere. This has caused considerable pollution of the water, air, and soil, as well as living things that depend on them. Countries that do not have access to oil and natural gas tend to use plants to get their energy by burning wood. We also use it for cooking, construction, and for refining metals, among other things. The world's forests are disappearing at a rate that will make most of them a memory by the end of this century, simultaneously killing off many of the creatures that call them home. By the time we run out of fossil fuels (and it doesn't matter when that happens), we won't even have a healthy natural environment to fall back on. This will make our transition back to the pre-industrial age even more difficult, if not impossible. How will we purify our water? How will we grow our food? Both are accomplished using fossil fuels. This is the second way that our civilization is unsustainable.

There's one more problem we need to look at, and it relates to the first line I wrote about the finite amount of energy on our planet. If we ignore the added energy of fossil fuels, there is little doubt that the available energy from the sun, via plants, has decreased significantly for about 200 years. Therefore, the total biomass of the earth must also decrease, because there just isn't enough energy left to support every living thing. The only way it can remain the same is for organisms to evolve greater efficiency of energy transfer. We can rule that out because evolution simply takes too long to adapt in the time frames we are currently dealing with. Well, that means that some critters need to die, and typically that happens near the top of the pyramid. Remember who's up there? Yeah... us. Don't worry, though. We're pretty adaptable after all, so let's assume that we're not the ones who will start croaking. That leaves all the other animals below us, many of whom are already extinct thanks to our efforts to sustain ourselves. Essentially, the only way for our population to stay at its current value (and remember that it will likely increase to 10 billion or more) is for many more creatures to go extinct. In the end, it might end up being just plants, insects, a couple of hearty animals, and humans. I don't know about you, but that's not a world I want to live in, thanks. This is the final way that our civilization is unsustainable.

In summation, the population needs to come WAY down, and we need to stop using fossil fuels NOW! You'll probably have to give up your IPhone, your computer, your BBQ, and a few other things, but the alternative is just not worth it. Your grandchildren are gonna be pissed off at you.

Got H2O?

At my friend's wedding last year, I took my last drink of alcohol. Actually, I had quite a few drinks and made a particularly awkward speech as I recall. In any case, I'd been planning to quit drinking for a while. Most people don't really understand this. I wasn't an alcoholic or anything. It just wasn't for me anymore. That was June 13th, 2009.

I should rewind a little bit though. A few years earlier, I'd started having stomach problems of unknown origin. For example, I ate a bowl of oatmeal before work one day and passed out on the assembly line a couple hours later. I thought it might be some kind of grain thing or an allergic reaction, but after a lot of trial and error, I determined the problem to be milk. I didn't really drink that much milk since I started living on my own, and when I did have it, my guts just couldn't handle it anymore. This was a shame because chocolate milk is among the greatest things in life. A little later, I lived in Japan, where no one drinks milk, for about a year. This just made the problem that much worse.

I came back to Canada in 2009, having already given up milk for good. I wasn't a big fan of pop or fruit juice, and I don't drink coffee. I started thinking about how virtually every animal drinks only water, and how our ancient relatives would have done the same. That's what we evolved to consume, after all. It didn't take long before I was committed to a water-only diet (still food though, of course). I had to make a few arbitrary rules in order for it to work. I still have soup, pudding, and the occasional frozen treat. Other than that, however, it's been 14 months now with the whole water thing. I feel fine. My bones haven't imploded or anything. As an added benefit, I've probably saved a minimum of several hundred dollars on unnecessary beverages.

Obviously this isn't for everyone. What started as a strange curiosity has basically become a way of life for me. I consider it a long term science project. We'll see how healthy I am in a few decades.

Don't pray, do something instead!

So I've been working on getting an employment visa to teach overseas in India, and it's been quite the struggle. I was under contract to begin working July 26th - nearly a month ago - but as you may have guessed I'm still stuck here in Canada.

Well, after about 7 weeks of fucked up politics and pointless thumb-twiddling, I'm about ready to give up. Last I heard, the consulate is waiting for some unnecessary document from some useless ministry, and I'm just sitting here decomposing...

Anyway, people keep telling me they are praying for me, and praying for these documents to arrive, and praying that everything works out. The problem is that no one is really doing anything. It's no secret that I don't believe in God, but even if I did, he is really of no help to me during this process. Who controls the speed of the mail? Well, aside from obvious limitations due to physics and technology, the mailman does. Who controls whether or not I get the visa stamp in my passport? The dude at the Indian consulate of course. Who controls whether or not I still have a job offer down the line? The head of Science at my school, obviously. I could continue, but there's really no point.

If I wasn't putting constant pressure on my school, the government, and the Indian consulate in Canada, this whole process would grind to a halt like an obese hamster. Seriously, take a break from prayer and start typing some emails! Make a few phone calls! I applied for a Japanese visa a few years ago and got it in no time. Could this be because they were working instead of trying to convince God to fill out some paperwork? Seems probable.

Intro

For those who are perhaps unaware, a heterogeneous mixture is a chemistry term for a mixture that contains several substances with distinct phases. This is pretty meaningless to most people, however. Just know that 'heteros' is Greek for 'different', and that I substituted 'genius' because I'm smarter than the average bear. The 'mixture' bit refers partially to the fact that I will no doubt cover a myriad of topics, but also because some douchebag already had the rights to Heterogenius.blogger!

I can guarantee you two things about this blog:

1. You will learn something

2. You won't not learn something

Thank you, come again!

Welcome! Sort of...

Hey, nice of you to join me.

I should point out that I'm not a big fan of humanity, but who knows, you might surprise me. It happens occasionally.

Most of the time I try to avoid people, not out of fear but simply out of disinterest. I don't care what you're selling, or what you did today. I don't care what you think of me, and I don't want to hear about the weather.

Whenever I go to a place where people congregate, I can't help but feel the horrible disorder and chaos around me. It really is frustrating to get stuck behind an impenetrable wall of gabby teenagers or a meandering old lady. I'd tell her to walk straight into a retirement complex, but she can't even walk in a straight line...

Seriously though, walking in public needs to be a course taught to every school child the world over. There's no reason why it shouldn't follow the exact same rules as driving. First thing's first: pretend there's an imaginary yellow line through the middle of the mall or wherever you are. If you live in North America, you walk on the right. Otherwise, the left side is for you.

The slow lane is on the right - that's where you know-nothing slow-ass window shoppers should be. On the left is the fast lane, where people who know what the fuck they are looking for walk with precision and speed. What you do in between these two zones is obvious, but honestly I really don't care because I'll be on the left.

If you would like to stop and chat it up with your pals, feel free to do so, but note that there is a designated location for such behaviour. It's called the food court. As a general rule of thumb, if you don't see chairs around, you need to keep moving.

Respect the right of way. If you're an idiot and threw your boobs in a guy's face to get your license, this means that if you come out of a store or want to change direction, you DO NOT have the right of way.

Check your mirrors. And by mirrors, I mean use your fucking eyeballs to see what's going on around you. Maybe I have phenomenal peripheral vision or something, but I have more than 180 degrees of awareness at all times, and I've seen people who are apparently fixated on their own noses or something.

Finally, put down your goddam phones while you're walking. Talking is acceptable, because it doesn't require the use of your eyes. My beef is with texting, and since most people would rather send 'lols' and 'zomgs' then pick up the phone and call someone, it's become quite the problem when I get my walk on.

In summary, there are really only two solutions for the lack of walking skills out there:

Implement a system such as the one stated above, or stop having so many damn kids.